Feel Threatened by Your Boyfriend’s Girl-Friends?

Your boyfriend may be friends with a lot of girls; some may be new acquaintances, old friends from school or college, some girls your partner really confides in etc. Seeing your partner sharing a very friendly and easy relationship with other girls can make you feel that the boyfriend values them more, confides more in them, may be actually having some intimate feelings for them and so on.

You may also feel that your boyfriend is hiding something from you, why is the need for girlfriends when you are there, do they discuss about you, is your presence in his life not enough, is he in love with one of them or is one of the girl friend in love with him and will eventually grab him from you.

All these thoughts can create threat, anxiety, doubt, confusion, frustration, fear and may lead to petty fights, lack of confidence, unfair blaming, over possessive behavior and can put the relationship under unnecessary strain and tension.

Get to know your partner’s girl friends better. Do not feel hostile, hatred or jealousy towards them. Rather accompany your partner when he is meeting his friends so that you can get some feel about the way your partner feels about these girls. You may just find that they are a close-knit group that cares and gets along very well, and probably there is no need for you to feel so alarmed.

Befriend some of the girls just like the boys. Developing good rapport, planning parties or outings with the partner and his girl/boyfriends will help to ease the tension and doubts you have.

If you genuinely feel that his relationship with a girl has more emotions than plain friendship, you may consider asking about this to your partner. Do not blame him or start accusing due to irrational fears. Ask politely about it, and see if the explanation is convincing.